Published September 23, 2005
Chief: Matt Stroud; Nonsense Management: Nate Bog(os/uszewski)
Visuals: Houston McIntyre; Master: Jesse Hicks;
Minister of Propaganda: Ben Edwards; Willy Loman: Mo Mozuch;
Editor-of-Color: Brentin Mock; Supreme Fashionista: Tiffany Boden
Apologies To: Bill; Chocolate Crackles From: Margo List
Deek Magazine gleefully accepts submission, but prefers to work with writers and visual artists on Incident-specific assignments. So! If you want to write or illustrate or design or photograph or... whatever, send an e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org (for writing) or email@example.com (for other artistic pursuits). The aforementioned e-mail should contain your social security number, your political affiliation, whether or not you're susceptible to disease, a photograph of yourself wearing a Terrible Burka - GO STILLERS! - and information regarding what, precisely, you want to do. If you just want to submit something, send it to firstname.lastname@example.org and realize that submission does not ensure publication and that anything you send might end up on our letters page.
1. No poetry. 2. I'm serious. 3. We can not pay you. 4. We do not accept paper submissions for writing (unless they're very silly or bad), but if you want to send your manuscript or your band's CD or your book or movie or comic book or lots of money, send it to:
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P.O. Box 7502
Pittsburgh , PA 15213
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Foreign: $50/year, $85/2 years
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Deek Magazine is published 10 times per year. Reproduction of Deek Magazine in any manner, in whole or in part, in print or online, black, white or fully-colored, in this life or the next, is prohibited without express, written consent of the publisher, Nova Keenan, who can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Deek Magazine reserves the right to edit all materials for clarity and space, and assumes no responsibility for anything, especially sanity - yours and ours alike. Some of Deek's content is constructed as fiction. Deek assumes no legal responsibility for cultural fallout from the Race Incident affecting the American people. This is in the sense that America already is, was, and ever shall be a race incident. Should rioting occur upon the awareness of racial intranquility as due to the misinformation, disinformation or miscegenation provided by Deek Magazine LLC, Nova Keenan's sweet white ass will have absolutely nothing to do with paying mind, money or reparations of any other form. When the riots do break out and taking up arms for the ensuing color war - we hope that Fuschia wins, Fuck Mauve - please remember to love your neighbor and flush only when necessary. You might want to hole in. Find a good spot. What about [that bartender at Boomerang's]? I'm not gonna fuck her with your dick. Well can I fuck her with my dick? Sure. And keep in mind that sometimes when a man wants to have a beer and play a game of chess in a bar he's not trying to swindle you, he just wants to talk. He could also very well be trying to bury his big black dick in your ass, so stay frosty. Some type samples and woodcuts taken from George Bruce's Sons & Co. and Deberny Type Foundry. Thanks.